Stop Allowing Temporary People to Share in Life's Special Moments

Written By:Felecia Causey

Photos By:Felecia Causey





 We live in a time where people switch personalities, change friends, and betray the people they claim to love like it is nothing. Most of the time, it saddens me to say that we let temporary individuals share in special moments. Brides and grooms are so quick to let people stand next to them at their weddings; mothers allow adversaries to watch their babies be born in the delivery room; parents call people who don't even deserve the title "godparents"; and you invite jealous people into your home.

Numerous brides have confided in me that they regret choosing the wedding party. One bride reported that as soon as her maid of honor learned they were engaged, she became really unpleasant. She showed little emotion in any of the pictures and showed no desire to participate in any of the bridal events. Many brides informed me they don't even communicate with most of the women who stood by her side on that particular day. She spent the most of her life among these folks. They swiftly faded after being a part of the most memorable moments in her life.

As a birth photographer, I understand the enthusiasm. When the kid is born, there is no way to express the emotions of the parents and others in the room. However, a room full of individuals with whom you are not very close should not be able to share in anything as extraordinary. People are in the room to be nosy, to be the first to see who the baby looks like, or to brag about seeing the infant first. Why are you enabling individuals to participate in something so big? The same individual who was allowed to see your private parts and witness the birth of your child now has no involvement in the child's or your own life. 

Personally, I was never a fan of calling someone my children's godmother or father. I never had a connection or was close enough to someone who deserved to be named that. I've had many conversations with folks who informed me they had to rescind the title because the person didn't fit the shoes or meet their expectations for the role. They were utter strangers to the child, yet they were eager to accept such an incredible honor. This is not the case for some; they are fortunate to have exceptional people who adore their child like their own. If you find someone who has taken this duty seriously, do not exploit or abuse them, but instead remain appreciative.

People are so willing to accept others into their personal space. I think allowing anyone to come into your home, including family, is a big thing. I had one of my clients tell me that they caught a cousin they once let visit on camera, came back to their house when they were gone, and robbed them. Those are unpredictable, so being cautious isn't crazy; it's just trying to keep out of the path of those who have no good intentions. There's nothing wrong with a little circle. If someone is unable to respect boundaries, do not let them into your personal area. I do not believe in allowing everyone inside my home.

It's terrible to have to question someone's motives. Is their intention good? Is their purpose to kill and ruin the joy and peace in your home? 
The next time a great occasion occurs in your life, please ensure that the people you decide to share it with are not temporary connections or situations.