I Am Mother Living With A Chronic Illness

 Featuring:Adrian Dunklin
Photography: Felecia Causey

My name is Adrian Dunklin. In 2012, I was diagnosed with sarcoidosis. It’s a chronic lung disease that turns your body against itself basically.  I never knew I had this disease because I was so full of life! I beat the odds of conceiving and gave birth to my first daughter. I began to feel as though I couldn’t breathe one day so I decided to finally get up and go to the doctor. Upon my examination, my doctor informed me that I have what she believed to be a collapsed lung. I was sent to the hospital. I was placed in ICU for four days.  I then had to see the lung specialist because it wasn’t a collapse lung, but rather I had lymph nods the size of golf balls in my chest and lungs. After being discharged two weeks later I was scheduled to have a lung biopsy. I was diagnosed with sarcoidosis. I started out with only steroids because my disease can only be treated and controlled, not cured. I cried daily and continued to ask God why me. What have I done to be cursed with such a horrible disease? Later that month I found out I was pregnant with my second daughter. This broke my heart because the doctors told me I would have a physically disabled child because of all the meds I was taking. I refused to take that. I believed that if God blessed my womb yet again, it was for a reason. I was 6 weeks pregnant having to do all my prenatal care at UAB Women’s and Infant Clinic. They warned me that I would not carry my baby full term and I also may miscarry. I just held on to my faith and continued to pray. During my pregnancy in order for me to try and save my baby I had to go off my meds. Months passed by and it came time to test her for abnormalities. Glory to God, she’s perfect with no defects. Only one thing came to pass. I gave birth at 33 weeks to 4lb 12oz premature baby girl. She wasn’t thriving and holding her weight and she had jaundice. I had to leave my sweet baby girl in the hospital. I stayed off my meds so I can give her the chance to live. I pumped and took milk her every day. She began to eat and gain. Soon after, I was able to bring my angel home. Thinking I have beaten all odds and had a great life. I had a man who loved me, two beautiful little girls and my health wasn’t proving to be all what the doctors said it would be. Years passed and I continue to do well with my meds and I thought everything was going to be fine. My family kept growing and I gave birth to my one and only son. After the birth of my son my health began to take a turn. Three weeks after his birth I was hospitalized with pneumonia. Being away from my newborn was so hard. I had to undergo another biopsy because the doctors noticed a spot on my lungs this time around. I instantly thought it was cancer. Glory to God it was only scar tissue. Long story short, I was hospitalized six times after that with pneumonia. Not knowing that that very medicine that was supposed to help me was doing me more harm. In May of 2017, my doctors finally decided it was more to what I had going on and referred me to UAB Pulmonary and Sarcoid Specialist. I had my first lung surgery. They found that I had lung closure and lots of scar tissue that would eventually cause my lung to collapse and send me into lung failure if I didn’t allow them to operate. Since I’ve had five balloon stent dilation surgeries to keep my airways open. I was tested positive for RA and now I know why my body hurts uncontrollably. I’m now on 13 – 16 pills a day depending on the day.  My mental state varies. I’m very emotional and depressed at times. I can be happy one minute and crying and sad the next. I began distancing myself from family and friends. Afraid that no one would understand what I was going through, I became a turtle inside a shell. I have no life outside of my home anymore. I stop buying clothes because in a month’s time I gained over 30lbs. My illness has cost me to lose my job because I’m no longer able to mix chemicals or be around fumes and dust anymore. My condition is very rare and never in a million years did I think I would be in this position, but through it all I will continue to trust God for healing. I just wish more people knew about it and understand that this never goes away for me. This is my new life. I want to live again, but am afraid of everything now.