What 2020 Has Taught Me..2021 I Am Doing What Is Best For Me


 

Written By: Felecia Causey

Happy New Year!! Wow 2020 was a year.  I can honestly say my family has been blessed. Although it taught me some heartbreaking stuff, I do know that it has made me stronger. I have learned to love my family harder and hug my kids more. As my kids have done virtual school since the pandemic has started, I have enjoyed the family time that we have had during these unknown times. I have watched them grow, and although I have great communication with my kids, it’s even better. As I realize that they both are no longer babies, I will enjoy the times making them hug me and have them lay their head on my shoulder like a baby. They hate it, but they will one day appreciate laying on my shoulder. The many board game nights, and the not so happy kids, for getting beat by their mom(me) are priceless. I wouldn’t trade the late movie nights that ended up with me falling asleep after the commercials for anything. Many families have lost loved ones, and I do realize that making memories is so important. My kids always tell me how thankful they are for what I do for them, but they don’t realize how much they impact my life.



I have learned that I love to cook. When the kids were in after school programs
or going to tutoring, eating out seemed easy, but the amount of money we were spending was ridiculous.  When we cut off eating out when the pandemic hit, our bank account reflected our savings. I made 3 meals a day menus and good grocery lists that kept me out of the stores, so often.  My daughter and I did meal preps together and laughed at the burnt food for trying something new. We spent more time outside while my husband grilled us food. It was fun and we started to be healthy. 


I saw different sides of people, and I realize that people were not me. My intention to always be good people was not something I was receiving back.  I cared too much about others feelings over mine and I worried about what people thought about me. I started realizing these people did not sleep with me or pay my bills. A person thought of me was between God and them. It did not take the blessings away that God had for me. They couldn’t convince Him to keep me from what He has already told me was mine. He really worked on me realizing that I was my own enemy. Leaving people where they are and focusing on my family and myself, would allow me to prepare for the doors He had ready to open for me. I will continue to do that. Everyone will not like me and even family will not celebrate me the way I would celebrate them in their life accomplishments. I am only worrying about those who think I matter, and moving on. It’s the best thing I did for me.


I was so quick to keep my guard up when it comes to people because of so much that has happened and the betrayal I have received. It’s not by just strangers, but by people you “thought” loved you and was there for you. The ones you expected to rejoice with you like you would do for them. I didn’t get that. I guess when someone isn’t loyal to me the way I am for them, I take it hard. I do not not want to shield myself from people who actual have good intentions. I had a lady I never met, gave my family  and I all of these cleaning supplies, during these times where stuff is hard to come by. The lady didn’t ask for anything, and she was not obligated to do anything for us, but she did. I am so grateful, that I didn’t allow myself to block my blessing from being so guarded.


2020 has taught me, what is for me is for me, no matter what anyone says or does. I have learned to appreciate my forgiving heart. I can know a person, talk about me and still help them and be nice. It’s not because I allow people to push me over, it’s because God has already taken care of it. I am so blessed to be loved by God. I fall short and I am not worthy, but God’s mercy is so amazing. People tarnish my name and drag me through the mud because they are mad at me or jealous and yet I know what is for me is for me. A person opinion of me does not change the Lord's love for little old me.


2021 is going to be a blast. I will take what I have learned and use it to make it a better me. We got this, but remember “faith is dead without work”. Let’s get the blessings, partnerships, business opportunities, and more together.

                                                                                                                                                                                

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