Keep Telling Her She’s Beautiful

Written By: Felecia Causey

Photography: Felecia Causey

Models: Alexis Morris and (stepdaughter) Jayona Butler-Young


I came across a viral video, where a little girl thought she was ugly, and she cried. It absolutely broke my heart. As a mother to a daughter, I make sure that she knows that she is beautiful, and I love her every day.  We live in a world where girls are being criticized about their hair, the color of their skin, and their body from not only strangers, but also family and friends.

With a world that constantly teaches women that your skin should be a certain color, or your hair must be straight, and curly or twisted. Colorism is a very big thing that plays a role in a lot of families, in which most it’s a topic that is never brought up.

Why have a child feeling like their skin isn’t beautiful because it’s not what you feel fits into your perfect family? She grows up questioning why she doesn’t have hair and skin like someone else, instead of teaching her to embrace the “unique” person she is.

“Am I ugly?” The heartbreaking words to hear any child ask. There are so many young kids killing themselves because of being bullied, for being or looking different.  As a mother, mentor, teacher, or any adult that is a part of a child’s life, tell them they are “amazing "just the way she is”.

So, her hair isn’t perfectly straight, her skin isn't as light as her cousin or the characters on TV, teach her that her beautiful imperfections are what you love about her.

Let's teach our girls to love and encourage another and stop putting a label on who people should be or how they should look.

We need to say words that build them up, not tear them down. Teaching them that they don’t have to listen and accept what others think of them.  How young is too young to teach her she is enough? With suicide taking the lives of kids as young as those who attend elementary school, building up self-esteem.

Does perfection exist? I’m sure many parents think their child/children are perfect in their eyesight. The beautiful light skinned or dark-skinned beauty we see, will not always be the impression someone else may see.  As much as we want our daughters to be “BeYoutiful Her”, the cruel and selfish trolls of both social media, classmates, and teammates will have the demon of insecurity affecting how she sees herself.

Fitting in is something many kids have a problem with, especially when the friends they hang with don't look like them, she will begin to question why her hair isn’t straight. 

Showing her how her imperfection makes her the amazing individual she already is.